I have a doubt now, here in my heart. Time that ticking so fast has brought my age more than 43 since last couple months. And I… I just don’t know what I actually looking for in my life. I keep single and no commitment. And everybody… one by one starting left me. They built their own family.
Take 2 days off from my success business that has given me lots of money, I invited a woman that I dated a weeks ago to visit this country. Picked her up with my jaguar, brought her flower, gave her nice present, it was enough to make her in love with me. And I start tired with this style. Will they still love me just like what they always said if I don’t have any of this shit?.. Well, I’m not quite sure.
Enjoy late of afternoon alone with my cigar because I sent that woman to enjoy spa in that luxury resort, suddenly I think about marriage, the shit thing that I never believe since long time. Then stupid thinking comes up, how I could manage marriage if even I don’t know how to commit to someone. I couldn’t even commit to a woman more than 3 months and I always had affair in every relationship that I had.
And… suddenly I remember her, a small girl that I used to date several months ago. She broke me up in last 2 months. Yeah she chose the right decision to leave me. And I know that she was the only woman that I ever date and never think about my money. She gave me love but I just didn’t understand why it was not enough and I still tried to search a pleasure from somebody else. This is like disease and I don’t know when I could be free from that.2 weeks ago I tried to call her again and asked her out for dinner. And when I met her I realized that this type of woman that I could spend rest of my life with. Pretty, smart, nice job and lovely… gosh I really don’t understand my self what else actually I want.
“I miss you, I really do. I thought about us many times and I realize probably you are my one”. That’s honest words from inside of my heart. She just gave me smile.
“I believe that you miss me sometime. But dear, I believe that you’ll never change. Because you still don’t know what actually you want in this life. And when another pretty woman comes and you’ll be so easy to forget me. Please just don’t put me in the shit condition again”.
"I know I’m difficult” and that’s all what I can say. I so respect her.
“I love you and I’m so crazy because I miss you badly sometimes but I don’t think I want you anymore. You know I care about you, so please baby…. learn how to commit to someone if you don’t want end up 60 and alone. I wish you luck. Good bye sweetheart.”
And she left me. Never ever in my life a woman did something like that to me. And I did nothing except kept silent on my table and thought about what she said.
This cigar now is almost finished and still silent ness fills the time. Yeah my life so far was money woman money and woman. And now when I want it, a true life and no one truly want me... they just want my money…
("oh Sweetheart, life is up and down... there is a time when everything that you have will be gone and if that happen i wish there is someone that will hold your hand and keep beside you to pass the difficult time... good luck on your way!")
(IeRn)
Take 2 days off from my success business that has given me lots of money, I invited a woman that I dated a weeks ago to visit this country. Picked her up with my jaguar, brought her flower, gave her nice present, it was enough to make her in love with me. And I start tired with this style. Will they still love me just like what they always said if I don’t have any of this shit?.. Well, I’m not quite sure.
Enjoy late of afternoon alone with my cigar because I sent that woman to enjoy spa in that luxury resort, suddenly I think about marriage, the shit thing that I never believe since long time. Then stupid thinking comes up, how I could manage marriage if even I don’t know how to commit to someone. I couldn’t even commit to a woman more than 3 months and I always had affair in every relationship that I had.
And… suddenly I remember her, a small girl that I used to date several months ago. She broke me up in last 2 months. Yeah she chose the right decision to leave me. And I know that she was the only woman that I ever date and never think about my money. She gave me love but I just didn’t understand why it was not enough and I still tried to search a pleasure from somebody else. This is like disease and I don’t know when I could be free from that.2 weeks ago I tried to call her again and asked her out for dinner. And when I met her I realized that this type of woman that I could spend rest of my life with. Pretty, smart, nice job and lovely… gosh I really don’t understand my self what else actually I want.
“I miss you, I really do. I thought about us many times and I realize probably you are my one”. That’s honest words from inside of my heart. She just gave me smile.
“I believe that you miss me sometime. But dear, I believe that you’ll never change. Because you still don’t know what actually you want in this life. And when another pretty woman comes and you’ll be so easy to forget me. Please just don’t put me in the shit condition again”.
"I know I’m difficult” and that’s all what I can say. I so respect her.
“I love you and I’m so crazy because I miss you badly sometimes but I don’t think I want you anymore. You know I care about you, so please baby…. learn how to commit to someone if you don’t want end up 60 and alone. I wish you luck. Good bye sweetheart.”
And she left me. Never ever in my life a woman did something like that to me. And I did nothing except kept silent on my table and thought about what she said.
This cigar now is almost finished and still silent ness fills the time. Yeah my life so far was money woman money and woman. And now when I want it, a true life and no one truly want me... they just want my money…
("oh Sweetheart, life is up and down... there is a time when everything that you have will be gone and if that happen i wish there is someone that will hold your hand and keep beside you to pass the difficult time... good luck on your way!")
(IeRn)
